Curiositykilledthe

I'm an alcoholic in training, I like to drink to fill the void. For now the feeling's boredom. For now its still a choice. One day I'll be a failure, filled with old plans and dreams. Right now they're still wet paint, Right now I've still a chance. Some day I'll be a whore, I flirt to feel less alone. For now it's just my heart. For now I'm fairly whole.

I think I've got depression she follows me around he hides behind the curtains waits to kick me when I'm down. My shirt says I'm with anxiety she lives within my gut he whispers in my brain holes that I'm a worthless slut. My heart says that I'm lifeless she rarely beats all day he stays in morbid silence but I've got so much to say. They trap me up here with them so I don't get to feel they'll say this worlds not for me they'll never let me heal.

Take my brain out of this skull smash it with a hammer. Just for something to do, fuck me life is dull. Place my liver on a plate heat it up in the microwave. Eat until full, I hate the world today. Crack apart my ribs remove my beating heart. Squeeze out the blood, why does it feel so hard to live?

A nameless shameless story That’s all you will ever be More to say I love the way That’s all you’ve ever given me. A cautionary tale to tell A splinter in my finger I have to say I feel this way You are simply mate, a minger. I’ll chew you and spit you out As an example of a guy Who took too long to figure out The true meaning of goodbye!

I could let this anger take me, It would let you think you won. But I’d rather choke to death, Than to give you that much fun. I would wish the skies to drown me, Before I’d let you see the day. When my enemies surround me, And I turn and run away. You inspire a hate within me, That burns me up inside. But I’d rather pluck my eyes out, Than have you steal my pride.

I have gotten good at ridding myself of people who drag me down. The near future is a question mark while the far future is a panic attack. I have learnt that it is not so easy to do what you want. It is even harder to know exactly what that is. If people question you more than you do yourself, something is awry. Jesus fuck is time flying by. My parents have no fucking clue what they're doing either. Everyone is winging it. I find that terrifying. Yet comforting at the same time.

I told you all the things that didn’t matter, The time, the place, the date. I watched your face change happy to sad, It didn’t mean anything. You told me you would wait. A pain too sharp to comprehend, That’s how you feel right today. I watched you sink down and down, It was only the one time. That was all I thought to say. Betrayal that leaves you speechless, I took your words from you. I felt your hand turn clammy, It doesn’t change anything. This is just what I do.